Living In Love
I am practicing living in love.
Without needing an object for my affection.
Because I’ve been in love enough to know that love is in side me, and doesn’t come from someone else. It’s something we feel and reveal when we connect with a special person or pet.
I had a wonderful feeling of love every day for more than 17 years that I shared my home with Lia, an amazing, intelligent, incredibly sweet cat. She died a couple of years ago, and I did not replace her. Sometimes I still miss her so much my eyes fill with tears. And I am deeply grateful to have had so much time with her. She taught me a lot about love.
So one day when I was going through a period of feeling unloved, unappreciated, and alone, I clicked on the radio and heard a love song.
I realized that all these songs were written to express love for someone. And I thought, “Why not listen as though they were sung to me by someone special?”
That feeling of being alone and unloved was a background feeling. A way of seeing the world. We’ve all had things in our lives that caused us to feel that way.
And yet all of us want to connect. Whether we feel that as a surface awareness or the need has been pushed deep down to avoid the pain of not having it. No one wants to feel isolated.
Even though for anyone who has survived trauma, it can feel safer to be left alone. Alone is still no fun. But it was the background “normal” in my life. Kind of like the wallpaper on my computer or smart phone.
Add to this the fact that we live in a world that is electronically connected, but not always connected in person.
As I heard a TV doctor say the other day, “Love may hurt. But loneliness can kill you.”
Time to Change the Station
New Thought tells us that we can change our lives by changing our thinking. If we tune our mental chatter to a station with negative thoughts, lonely thoughts, sad thoughts, self-pitying thoughts, it CAN affect our health and sense of well-being.
But we can CHOOSE to change that station. The same way we change the radio station. We used to use a radio dial. Now it’s the scan button. Either way, you can scan for thoughts that feel better. You can actually direct your mind to think what you want.
Now I’m not asking you to deny reality or bury your head in the sand.
But you can choose what you put into your mind by choosing what you watch on TV, what you listen to on the radio, and what friends you hang out with. And what books you choose to read.
And you can write down what you want in your life, and choose to believe that it’s possible. After all, people laughed at the Wright Brothers, they laughed at the idea of electric lights or radio transmission. People were thrown in prison for insisting that the world was round.
So why not start directing your mind instead of letting it run rampant like an undisciplined child? Why not gently begin to direct your mind to think kinder thoughts about yourself, your world, other people, and your life?
My Own Love Playlist
So I decided to make a play list of my favorite love songs. But with this list, I would not sing along.
I chose songs with lyrics I want to hear, and allowed myself to take them in. I listened and received these lyrics. I really felt that this is how someone feels about me.
It’s a way to call the One into my life. That One can be Spirit, or it can be the man of my dreams.
I listened to this playlist every day, and within a week, I felt lighter, happier, more loved. I began living more in Love. Why not live in Love every day. Walk through it, let it wash through me, feel it, appreciate all the beauty around me.
It feels good! Why not?
A New Normal
It made a difference in how I showed up in the world. How do I know? Because a close friend mentioned to me that I had been more positive. I smiled and said, “I shifted something inside me, and it changed how I show up.”
Give it a try. Look for your favorite love songs, and put them on your smart phone, or burn them to a CD. Listen every day as if those songs were being sung to you. And see if it makes a difference in your background feeling of the world.
It’s a Practice to Remember
And when I feel myself slipping into the “I’m alone.” pitty pot, I listen to the playlist again and remember how cherished I am.
Make your own playlist. Pick songs you wont’ be tempted to sing along with. Learn to RECEIVE them in your heart! To get you started, here’s what’s on my playlist:
Be Mine, David Gray
Absolutely, the Subdudes
Back Door to My Heart, Mark Selby
Close Your Eyes, Aaron Neville
Crazy Love, Van Morrison
Don’t You Know, Keb’ Mo’
Every Morning, Keb’ Mo’
Have I Told You Lately, Van Morrison
I Have Loved You For a Thousand Lifetimes, Michael Whalen
Just the One (I’ve Been Looking For), Huey Lewis
Morning Glory, the Subdudes
Now and Always, David Gray
Ribbon In the Sky, Stevie Wonder
She Is My Everything, John Prine
Sound of Her Voice, the Subdudes
Straight Into Sunrise, Gato Barbieri
Stay Here In Your Arms, Cedric Burnside
Tell Everybody I Know, Keb’ Mo’
Two of Us, the Beatles